From cityviews to Cityview

What to do? What to do? Another weekend and I'm feeling ambitious. Why not climb the the Filbert steps, check out Coit tower and its lovely murals, then eat some delicious dimsum? Too much? Naah, I can pack it all in in one morning. You'll see.

First, we climb those darned steps. I must, I must, I must uplift my buns! Yes, dears, climbing stairs is a good derrier booster. J Lo and Kim K taught me that.



Once we've reached higher altitudes (pant...pant...), the views were amazing, but the murals by Diego Rivera were even more fabulous. Did you know he used to have sex with Frida Kahlo? I can't do such a thing, not because Frida's not awesome, it's just that I'd be too distracted by the brows, and the moustache and the headress... Sorry, Frida. I'll have to decline.
Below, you'll see photos of the delicious views and some details of the Diego Rivera murals I just mentioned. One detail shows a robbery in action, I guess that was painted in the Tenderloin area, the other is a blonde woman cradling cala lillies, one of my favorite flowers.




After getting my fill of visual feasts, what better way to end a pretty walk through this amazing city than to satisfy that craving in your tummy for cute, bite-sized asian delicacies? Cityview restaurant offers fresh and yummy dimsum that is evidenced by the long line outside its doors. You can see by the pictures that they do a good job with presentation (thanks to my photographer, Boobsie). They not only look good, they taste good, too. Yes, a bit pricier than other dimsum places in Chinatown, but you get your money's worth.


Above, you see tofu and eggplant (a tad oily for my taste) and the classic pork shumai to its right. Below is a sea anemone-looking creation and to it's right, fried eggroll stuffed with shrimp meat, fried crab claws, chinese broccoli with oyster sauce, and crabmeat on top of green bell peppers. Jealous? I love San Francisco!

Clog - Unclog

San Francisco is a walking town, despite its steep hills and varying micro-climates. I personally enjoy meandering around the different neighborhoods and seeing the different sights, smelling the different smells, and licking the different lickable items. We truly live in an amalgamation of different lifestyles and cultures and all of this is easily accessible to bipeds, so when I heard about the San Francisco Sunday Streets happening at the Embarcadero, I had just had to go.

I had a plan. First, eat heart-stopping, cholesterol laden food at Red's Java. It's supposedly an SF tradition. If Bourdain loved it, I should, too. Then un-clog the damage done to my arteries by power strolling through the closed street until I get to Pier 39 for more sinful delights, for there in that tourist trap is a destination onto itself: my favorite doughnut place, Trish's Doughnuts.

Well, the food at Red's Java was typical diner fare. Nothing too special, but the ambience was just pure, authentic, by the bay SF. Eating my huevos rancheros (see pic above) al fresco while fending off birds' advances to my food was simply too precious and charming. (Okay, the birds were slightly annoying and the sun's morning rays were getting into my eyes was just irritating and temporarily blinding, but what do you think you'll get from a blog about loving SF?) I'm coming back to try their Fish and Chips, though. I love fish and chips, and that's an order you just can't mess up.

On our brisk walk to Pier 39, working up a sweat to undo the heart clogging we just did, we witnessed a queue forming outside this concrete building. We stumbled in the TCHO plant where they were offering free chocolate samples. What?! Free and Chocolate? My fave combo, more than combo # 3 (apply to any restaurants that list their combo plates, you'll see that the third option is always best). The samples range from fruity, to nutty. I especially loved the fruity, because I am fruity, too. Although if you follow that logic, then I must equally love nutty. I'm confused...I wonder if they'll come up with a flavor that's as complex as I am. They'll call it The Complicated and Complex Conundrum that is Jonsey Balonsey. I'll have to ask for a cut on all the sales they make. No, I'm not a money grubbing whore, but we live in a capitalist society. I might as well get a piece of the pie. Hmmm, pie. I guess they can also sell banana-chocolate cream pie and for the chocolate part, they can use The Complicated and Complex Conundrum that is Jonsey Balonsey flavor. I'll ask for a percentage of the profits from that, too. Then I'll be rich and famous and more people will read my blog, but because I'm rich and famous, I won't have time to write this blog anymore, since I'll be too busy trying to come up with a new chocolate flavor that will top the sales of The Complicated and Complex Conundrum. Anywho, I digress. Below, you'll see the chart/paper plate they came up with to offer their measly samples.

We were moving on and powerstrolling when we finally made it to Pier 39 I was sooooo excited to finally have some Trish's doughnuts after months of abstinence that I almost peed my pants. It's time to re-clog the superior vena cava! I ordered my usual six-piece bag, it looked scrumptious, then took a bite...Um, what happened? This isn't how it usually tastes. It's usually soft, fresh, and billow in the inside. Today it's dry and overcooked. Boooooooo! Where's the consistency? I hate unrealized expectations. Trish, you better get your act together, or else... I still finished the bag, though.

The Wonderful World of Wondercon

Is it any wonder why Wondercon has achieved a Must-Attend status? For the past few years we’ve religiously attended this annual Spring soiree designed and designated to the beleaguered and bespectacled, and to this day the wonders never cease to amaze.

Mostly we come to see the Hollywood elite fly north to peddle their latest wares. In previous years, we witnessed Brandon Routh promote the return of Superman (snore, he should’ve stayed wherever he was, although, I must say, Brandon's quite a chesty specimen, where is he?), we saw Chris Pine announce the come-back of Captain Kirk (Thank you, JJ Abrams, you have good taste in leading men..casting couch much?), and Christian Slater sell his moody, gravelly-voiced, depressed take on Batman (darkness fits him like dark eye shadow fits Kristen Stewart). This year was Jake Gyllenhall's turn to sell his biceps to the bespectacled masses, read: nerd herd, and we bought it (I don't know how to quit you, Jake!). I enjoyed the exclusive trailer they showed of "Prince of Persia", but I would've preferred to see the scenes from "Brokeback Mountain" that didn't make it to the movie screens. American's are just so prude. It took a Chinese director to showcase homo love, proving that alternative lives are Oscar worthy. Why aren't we more artsy? Arg!

Other reasons to come to Wondercon are the fun merchandise, from the unrepentively kawaii to the weirdly bizarre toys (see right picture above). Also, just people watching. I saw Deanna Troy, Lindsey Wagner, Erin Gray, female icons of mine from decades past, and lay people who enjoy dressing up as their favorite super hero, or Star Wars characters (see left picture above). So much fun. It's a time when freakazoids can let their freak flags flutter wildly in the blowing wind...and how they blow. The winds of change are a-blowin', my dear nerds. Soon the world will be ours and Victory, The Force, My Precious, Unobtainium, Kryptonite, and the matching Wonder Twins Rings will be ours. The whole, wide world will be bowing to our every whim! Bwahahahaha! Wait, hold on, is there food stuck on my braces? No? Ok,good. Bwahahahahahaha!